Ugh. Yesterday, our girls varsity has now secured their spot as number one girls team on the school league. And I’m absolutely ecstatic about it. And I want to tell everyone. But, no one is going to be supportive about it. They’re gonna be like “bowling isn’t a sport.” But it is! We work hard. At least the good people. And sure, anyone can bowl. But that doesn’t mean you’re good at it. I’m just so tired of unsupportive people here. And like. At least I’m good at something and it makes me happy. Am I not allowed to be happy about one thing? Or be good at something? I know its lame. So be it. But if you were like us…if you were like us, you’d understand how hard it is. And I’m just sick of everything. Its as if I’ll never be good enough for everyone. I hate my life.
I’m super proud of you, doodlebug, and the whole team.
Here’s what I’m working with and how I want to fix it;
///disgusting body, iffy dressing habits, bad sleeping habits,lack of motivation to work out
I’m just going to stop eating. She may not have been fat in the first place, but it worked for her. And I want some sort of exerise equipment. Something that makes me feel like I’m actually working out. And, if I start getting thinner, then I can dress better since I won’t have to only shop at fat stores. This would improve self image 100%.
///lufferly, caring boyfriend, light feelings for ex, lost virginity
Robby is amazing. I’ve spent the last half a year with him, and I can’t imagine spending the next half a year and more with anyone else. Really, he’s the only thing keeping me alive. I probably would have killed myself by now if I didn’t promise him I wouldn’t. I kinda feel like he needs me. Other people might too, but I know he does. Maybe that’s why I gave him a part of me no one else will ever have. And, Jessie, fuck him. I’ll admit I had residual feelings for him in august, but now that he’s ignoring me, I’m done. E was my first love , at least I thought he was, so I’ll always love him. But now it’s just a reminiscing kinda love, like how you loved a pet.
\ I’m going to be slightly less dependent on Robert, but keep him close to my heart. I havethis weird feeling like I want to marry him. How awkward is that? I’m young, can I really feel like that? I’m going to.forget Jessie. He may have been one of my best friends before, but now he’s just someone who abandoned me.
///best friend, good friends, fading friends
I want to make new friends. There are some people I think I could connect with. Rachael, Jennifer, David, they’re all friends that I think would make great close friends. I just need to take that step, right? And I need to let people go. She doesn’t talk to me anymore? Fuck her. We don’t have classes together? Try again then drop it. That’s how I need to think.
///grades are good, procrastinate
I really want to work hard this year. Turn stuff in on time, study for tests, pay attention, who knows if it’ll happen?
So this is it everyone. Let’s make everything better.